Johnson Defeats Horse
Claims victory for the absurdly-clothed
Cincinnati Bengals WR Chad Johnson totally smoked a horse in a 1/8 mile long race. How bad is that?
Johnson's reaction?
"Floyd Mayweather, you're next. I want to fight you. I'd like to take Kobe and LeBron one-on-one. Jeff Gordon, we can take a couple laps. ... Now it's my time to take over the race world."
That makes sense. Now, if only Chris Henry could outrun cops...
Hey-Oh!
(Image and quote from SI.com)
UPDATE: Please (and I mean please) enjoy footage of this storied event here. It features trash-talking gems such as:
"He [Restore the Roar, a horse] doesn't even have a game plan for Ocho today."
Labels: bengals
posted by dan @ 8:12 PM
7 Comments:
almost enough to make a bengal fan forget about them shitting their pants in the super bowl. oh wait...
Sarge, please.
Talk trash about the Reds, if you must, they are one of the worst teams in baseball. But are you seriously going to sit there and shit talk about a superbowl that happened almost 20 years ago? One that you really only care about because the team that won was good when you were a kid, so you decided to root for them because you're a lily-livered fair-weather Montana-lover?
Again, please. Have fun with Alex Smith next year. I'll be busy drinking champagne in a hot tub with Ocho Cinco and Carson. (And, no doubt, tons of babes.)
Holy shit, I just watched the video. How much of a fucking head start did he have? Truth be told, I like Chad Johnson, but for chrissake's man, I could have beat the horse.
perhaps we should call Restore the Roar and see if he's up for the challenge?
I would like to make it a little more interesting with a slight modification: at all times, the participants must be drinking a coke.
my client Restore the Roar accepts, provided both participants also devour an entire feedbag of oats immediately prior to the race.
of course. I only ask that an ambulance be available for the end of the race.
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